"The Little Things Are Everything"

My 5 year old son asked me weeks ago, why do we get mom flowers every Friday and take her on a date. I told him as simply as I could, that it’s necessary to keep love functioning at optimum levels. I chose this topic today because many people believe that a marital contract is all that is needed to maintain novelty, excitement, fire and juice in their relationships. Many men unfortunately are still operating off their Grandfathers relationship template.

This consisted of making all the money and making most of the household decisions strongest up to around 1945. For the first time in modern history, women are now on the same parallel with men in education and income. Many professional women quantify a mans income today more like a credit card perk. They really don't need it, but if it's there you can apply it to some retail therapy. My wife walked in the door one evening after sitting for 2 hours in the salon and another 2 hours getting a mani and pedi. When she arrived home, I asked her what she wanted to do for dinner. After about an hour of this rather perfunctory disposition from my wife, I suddenly realized the mistake that I made and apologized. My hunger pains influenced my rational thinking. Masculine energy responds to challenge but feminine energy responds to praise and attention. At the moment my wife walked in the house, she was looking forward to me immediately acknowledging how beautiful her hair and nails were. As a man, I have learned over the years that the professional woman's love language has evolved over time. This is why I have to make sure that our energies and vision are congruent so that our paths don't become segregated. This is often achieved through weekly communication about our direction. Conversely, as women began to take on more positions of authority, they have to understand that positions of authority require masculine energy. Masculine energy leads, directs, delegates and controls. I did not say man or woman don’t get confused. I’m speaking of energies. Professional women who occupy positions of authority, if your core is feminine energy, you must learn to turn down the opposing energies before you start to operate in your domestic zones. There is nothing more attractive to a man than a woman who smiles. The failure to do so could significantly disrupt relationship polarity. The 21st century man is holding on by a shoe string, because he can no longer leverage what his grandfather leveraged to establish domestic significance. Men don’t want challenge they require challenge. Challenge is necessary for a man to receive acknowledgement. Most men learned based on what they saw. The environment that they were raised perpetuated a mindset that a man was responsible for being a provider. This became his reference point for learning. As a result, you will have to teach him on how vitally important it is for you to receive copious amounts of love, affection, attention and praise. He has to teach you on how important it is to trust and allow him to lead in his area of expertise without interference. Also, never leverage intimate pleasures as a form of discipline. I assure you, if you continue to discipline a man by withholding sexual pleasures he will likely wonder over time as his value and belief system falls victim to his sexual desires.

The 21st century woman is not as dependent on her man’s income in the same capacity as her grandmother was to her grandfather. We are in the middle of a paradigm shift and the old thinking will sink your ship if you don’t make necessary adjustments. Never stop dating your mate even if it’s a walk in the park. If your relationship is not right, your family will pay the price. The failure to do so will lead you down a dark empty cavern as dopamine levels sink to it’s lowest point. This occurs In most cases around year 7 or sooner.

Edward Cunningham